Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Crazy sex worker nut mum

Life has been crazy busy (as it is with most people I know) - it's about a year since I last blogged..... News??? So today I told someone I was a prostitute. Well not quite. I inferred I might be. Why? For about 2 weeks I've been trying to get a receipt out of a large shopping centre for a client so I can claim it back from the client. After them not returning my calls, today I finally got someone and they told me "we don't do receipts. Just show the client your credit card statement and claim it back that way". I saw red. It's a legal requirement to provide a receipt and I really don't think it's my client's business to see my statement and what I spend the $ on, so in my reply I didn't want to be rude or yell, so I decided to shock. "I'm sorry but what if I was working as a prostitute and didn't want my client to know. They'd see my transactions including adult shop purchases?". It sent the people around me into fits of giggles but it achieved the result. Well sort of - as I'm yet to see the promised receipt in my inbox. When the world is crazy I think the only way to deal with it, is to have a sense of humour. Or maybe I'm the crazy one? As an example, it's amazing how crazy (and stressful) life is with a child anaphylactic to nuts. I'm the mum everyone hates - I'm the ultra crazy nut mum. I used to think people like me were massive helicopter parent attention seeking weirdos. Every nut reference triggers my thoughts. I think about it every time I read a label on a box or buy something new. If I get a call from day care I immediately think he's had a reaction. The epi pen goes EVERYWHERE!!! Last night I was reading a novel where the girl rubbed luxuriant almond oil into her face before a date and my first thought was 'but what if he's allergic to nuts?' Then I realised I'm going to have to get Mack to be vigilant in briefing girlfriends.... Or maybe I have to talk to the girls first. Oh gee. Crazy nut mum. Or what is he has a one night stand so I don't get time to brief her and she's covered in almond stuff. Hang on - he's just turned 2. Breathe..... I can put this worry on hold for 15 years. Apart from a nutty mother, life is fairly normal at Castle Chaos. Karly has joined us and we're hoping this will mean we can all settle down into a nice happy fun routine. In the last 5 months I've briefed 4 au pairs on how to help our family from the type of bread to buy, to what uniforms the kids wear, how to work the washing machine, how to use the house alarm, emergency numbers, epi pen training, where the shops are, buses to catch, the list goes on... We're all really lucky to have had some awesome young ladies help us out but now it's time to focus on spending the time with one fabulous new au pair for the longer term. We're all very excited. I haven't blogged for ages so here's an update: -Bella has moved out of failure to thrive mode and is now on the 5th percentile. Yay! - Mark's dad is very sick again - bugger - My dementia Grandma is hanging in in there at 99 - neutral - I've got a change management exam in Sydney coming up through the Change Management Institute for accreditation - Yuk! - Corporate Princess Communications and Social Advisory) is pottering along nicely - Yay! - La's 8th birthday is in a few weeks so we're in party organising mode - Busy! - I'm the basketball coach for La's Under 10 team for next semester - scary as some of you will remember I used to play professionally so I need to learn to tone down the competitive alpha thing. (I'm thinking no whiteboards and strategy for 7 and 8 yos - just tell them to be spiders and not butterflies. Gotta stop yelling out "get a foul") - neutral - Mack still loves garbage trucks. I have to read the same book about a bear that gets chucked out in the garbage every night and his favourite words are 'Be quiet Bella'. - cute - I have a heap out of hours consultation sessions (about 20 hours on Thursday and Friday nights and Saturdays) for a client booked over a 2 week period and accidentally booked over our wedding anniversary and La's birthday - when did I think this was a good idea? - bugger - Mark is enjoying his work - although he always seem way too busy and I love that Bella wants to buy him a computer for Fathers' day as 'he's always on one' - good - I did reading group at school this morning for the kindy class. I love having a career that might be busy but is flexible - yay!